I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while but with the holidays and all the chaos that surround Christmas and New Years, I hadn’t gotten around to doing it. Some time before school let out for the holiday break, I took Madison, our 2nd youngest child, to have an ultrasound of her stomach. This medical office was much like any other office. There were rows of chairs in the waiting room, a coffee and water station, a long check in counter, books and magazines to entertain the children, tv, and so on. After we got checked in, we had about a 15-20 minute wait as the technician hadn’t arrived yet so I told Madison to find herself a book to look at while we waited. She went over to the big basket of books and dug through it for a few seconds until she found one that she was interested in. It was a really cute pop up book, lots of fun to look at. I think pop up books were always my favorite as a kid. We read the whole thing together and once we were finished, we still had another 10 minute wait  so she went back to the basket to find another book. I wasn’t prepared for what she brought back…

You read that right folks...the story of farts.

You read that right folks…the story of farts.

I really wish I had taken a picture of her face because it was hilarious. I think she chose the book at first because it had an elephant on the cover but then when she started reading the title out loud to me, she realized what the book was about. Imagine her sitting next to me, pointing to each word as she reads it out loud and when she gets to the word “farts” she sounds it out and then pauses, mouth drops open, eyes get big, she looks up at me, and lets out the funniest giggle I’ve ever heard. Then she says, “Amanda! This book is about FARTS!!!” and she laughs again. It was hilarious and of course I’m laughing at her reaction but I’m also a little shocked and amused by the book myself. So now of course she’s eager to crack it open and see what its all about. She opens the front cover and this is the first page…

The Gas We Pass: The Story of Farts

Yep. When an elephant farts, the farts are really big, that’s to be expected right? Big animal, big butt, big fart…makes sense. Madison finds this page particularly amusing. Seriously wish you could see her face, I should have recorded her reading this book. As a parent, who doesn’t allow the kids to use the word fart because it sounds vulgar, I’m a little put off by the book. I’m amused by it but also a little concerned. I’m assuming the book is going to educate the kids on why you get gas but so far all we know is that elephants have really big farts. Then we turn the page….

The Gas We Pass: The Story of Farts

You guys. Do you see it? I mean, I see it. I saw it the second she turned the page. So did she. Thankfully she didn’t ask me to explain it, her reaction was “eww gross he’s naked!! And he tooted!!” Which in turn made me laugh but seriously, this children’s book about farting also has anatomically correct drawings!! In addition to the drawings, the author uses correct terms such as anus. Try explaining that one to a 6 year old. “Amanda, what’s anus?” Do you see me dying, curling up inside my coat in this doctor’s office? Thankfully we were the only people in the waiting room so there were no witnesses to this awkward story time.

Every time she read a page and prepared to turn to the next one, I cringed. I didn’t know what to expect! Thankfully we were saved by the ultrasound tech so I can’t tell you what happened next in the book. I can imagine though, that Madison went to school and had one very interesting conversation with her friends about her trip to the doctor’s office and the book she read while she was there. For those of you who are curious and want to learn more about farting, you can buy this book on Amazon.